


The Best Medicine

by ZippyZapmeister



Category: Love Live! School Idol Festival (Video Game), Love Live! School Idol Project, Love Live! Sunshine!!
Genre: (but sometimes they do), Alternate Universe - Hospital, Based off of their job SRs, Disclaimer: Sometimes Card Tricks DON'T Get You Laid, F/F, for the record maki's name isn't explicitly said???? but it's her., kind of.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-27
Updated: 2017-03-27
Packaged: 2018-10-11 13:35:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10466217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZippyZapmeister/pseuds/ZippyZapmeister
Summary: Riko had only been a nurse at Nishikino Hospital for a month, and she had seen some weird things, but a girl in a magician’s costume that looked like it had been through a garbage disposal with a bakery in it really stole the show.





	

**Author's Note:**

> this arose from discord shenanigans and the job SRs also i'm half-conscious rn

The first time she came in, her uniform was covered in tiny holes and bits of cake. Riko had only been a nurse at Nishikino Hospital for a month, and she had seen some weird things, but a girl in a magician’s costume that looked like it had been through a garbage disposal with a bakery in it really stole the show. However, Dr. Nishikino didn’t seem bothered at all. “Oh, it’s Tsushima-san again? I’ll come with you on this one,” she said, tucking her strawberry-colored hair behind her ear.

 

Riko furrowed her brow in confusion, but nodded. She had assumed Dr. Nishikino would have something better to do rather than linger around what seemed like a minor case, but Riko really wasn’t one to question her motives. They walked into the room and Riko looked back at the chart that triage had filled out. _Attacked by birds...? That’s new._ When they walked in, Riko smiled politely and said, “Good afternoon, ma’am.”

 

The blue-haired girlー”Yoshiko”, her chart saidーsimply grunted. Dr. Nishikino just laughed at her irritation. “This is Sakurauchi-san. I might as well introduce you,” she said, sitting on the hospital bed. “You know, it _has_ been a month since Riko started working here, and you two are just now meeting...I thought it would happen a lot sooner. Either that or you’d died.”

 

“Gee, thanks. I haven’t been close to dying in a year and a half, thank you very much. The great Yohane may suffer from multiple perils...some of which are more dangerous than you’ll ever experience, mind you...but she won’t be defeated so easily!”

 

Dr. Nishikino laughed again, but Riko was shell-shocked. Who the hell was this girl? The magician getup, the odd third-person speech, the bird attacks...Riko was starting to get a bit frightened. The doctor clicked her tongue and said, “Hey, do you wanna go in the bathroom and clean that bird shit off of your jacket?”

 

“Ugh. I might as well throw this awa-”

 

“I-I thought that was cake,” Riko blurted out, watching in horror as Yoshiko took off the hole-filled jacket and shoved it in the trashcan.

 

Yoshiko (Yohane?) tossed her head back and chuckled. “So naive, little demon.”

 

“P-pardon me...?”

 

“Don’t worry, Riko. I’ll take it from here,” Dr. Nishikino said, clicking her pen.

 

Riko wasn’t prepared to argue. That girl gave her the creeps...

 

* * *

 

In the end, it didn’t matter _how_ creeped out Riko was, because a week later, Yoshiko was back. She had a new jacket, but it was covered in holes, similar to the other one. However, when Riko checked the chart, the issue that time seemed to be “rabbit attacks”. _That’s bad luck if I’ve ever seen it..._

 

Dr. Nishikino seemed to be rather busy that day, so she didn’t have time to come laugh at Yohane’s outrageous injury. For some reason, Riko was nervous about being alone with Yoshiko. At least, she thought it was nervousness. Her heart was racing, and her palms were a little sweaty. In fact, they were so sweaty that when she tried to take notes on her chart, she kept dropping her pen, apologizing frantically as she picked it up over and over again.

 

“Hey, are you new, or something?”

 

“I’ve been here a month,” Riko said. She bent over, searching for her pen. Why was that crazy girl freaking her out like that?!

 

“...Hey.”

 

Riko popped up, blushing furiously. “A-ah, Tsushima-san, I’m sorry, but first I have to find...uh...”

 

Riko trailed off as Yoshiko leaned in close, brushing her hair away from her face and tucking it behind her ear, slowly...almost seductively. _Oh, my gosh. This is just like my manga,_ Riko thought, as the palm of Yoshiko’s hand ghosted over her cheek-

 

“Ta-da.”

 

From behind Riko’s ear came...the pen. “D-did I put it there?”

 

“No. It’s magic, courtesy of the fallen angel, Yohane,” Yoshiko said, as if that was just common sense.

 

“...I must have put it back there and forgotten,” Riko murmured.

 

She wasn’t sure about the pen, but the way Yoshiko made her heart race was definitely _some_ sort of magic.

 

* * *

 

“...Should I be touching this jacket?”

 

“No, no, it’s actually cake this time. I tried to pull these rings apart for my grand finale, and...long story short, I broke a table and my arm hurts in a way that it shouldn’t.”

 

“Ah.”

 

Riko wasn’t sure how Yoshiko had survived a month without coming to the emergency room, in all honesty. Ever since her first appearance, Yoshiko had been coming about twice a week. After three weeks, it was just natural for Riko to see Yoshiko, even though she couldn’t stop herself from getting a little flustered.

 

Between conversations with Dr. Nishikino, her own intuition, and somehow deciphering Yoshiko’s dramatic spiels, Riko was able to discover three things: Yoshiko was a magician; she believed she was a fallen angel named Yohane; and for some reason, she had terribly bad luck that ended up making her a regular patient at the hospital. However, according to the doctor, Yoshiko was awfully good at her job; children found her fallen angel schtick mesmerizing. “If I were miserable enough to have some kids of my own running around, she’d be the one I’d call,” she pointed out one day. Riko actually agreed.

 

One day, Riko grew curious. She had seen one of Yoshiko’s tricks before, with the pen, but the rumors of her wonderful performances had intrigued Riko. As she took Yoshiko’s soiled jacket and folded it over a chair, she said, “The x-ray should be coming back soon, but it seems like your arm is going to be out of service for a bit. Perhaps a fracture.”

 

“I did hit the table pretty hard,” Yoshiko whined, smacking her forehead.

 

Riko almost wanted to ask how separating rings turned into a fractured arm, but she instead said, “Hey, um...while we wait, would you mind, maybe, perhaps, showing me a trick?”

 

“No angel works for free.” Riko blinked. “That...that was a joke. I was just kidding.”

 

She looked embarrassed, and Riko laughed; not at the “joke”, but at the adorably sheepish look on Yoshiko’s face. “So?”

 

“Alright, alright. Hand me the deck of cards out of my bag,” Yoshiko said, waving her hand dismissively. Riko nodded and dug through the back, pushing aside a hat, some rings, and other assorted niceties. Finally, she pulled out a little rectangular cardboard box and handed it to Yoshiko, who took out the cards and shuffled as she spoke. “I’m sure you’ve seen a trick like this on television.”

 

 _In a manga, maybe,_ Riko almost said, but she just nodded again, then added, “Careful with that arm.”

 

“I’m willing to sacrifice my health for my crowd of little demons!” Yoshiko bellowed. She looked at the deck for a second, then held it out. “Now, pick a card, if you please.”

 

Riko tried to pick a rather inconspicuous one, just to see if the trick would work. She looked at it, a queen of hearts, then put it back in the deck at Yohane’s instruction. Yohane shuffled the deck a couple of times, tongue swiping across her bottom lip firmly in concentration. Finally, she began to pluck cards out, placing them face-up on the sheet of the hospital bed and disregarding them completely. She came to another card, but she put it down slowly; an ace of spades. “Nuh-uh,” Riko said, shaking her head. “No good...that’s not my card.”

 

Yoshiko scoffed. “I never said it was...after all, _this_ one is.”

 

And then, with a flourish, Yoshiko removed the next card from the deck...a queen of hearts. “N-no way! Did you see it?!”

 

“No...I _felt_ it. A little demon with such a strong essence, like you...it’s easy to sense you all over that card-”

 

“Okay, so you saw it.”

 

“No. I just said no, jeez!”

 

Riko narrowed her eyes. Just as she was about to give in and ask what kind of “magic” Yoshiko performed, exactly, Dr. Nishikino walked in. “Sakurauchi-san! Are you seriously slacking off because of some dumb parlor trick? The x-ray has been done for a while, now...”

 

“A-ah, sorry, Nishikino-san! I’ll get to it-”

 

“Don’t worry, I already have it. Congrats, Tsushima-san, your arm’s fractured. Looks like you’ll be doing nothing _but_ card tricks for a while, unless you find a way to injure yourself doing that, too,” Dr. Nishikino said, tossing Yoshiko her file. “Now, Riko...go round up her discharge papers while I discuss medication. And stay focused, please.”

 

Riko walked away, with her metaphorical tail tucked between her legs. She wasn’t sure what it was, but that fallen magician had captivated her.

 

* * *

 

For about a month after the fractured arm, Yoshiko didn’t show up, and Riko had to admit, it was a tad disappointing. _I probably just got_ used _to her, is all,_ Riko thought. However, taking care of feeble old people and listening to toddlers scream as she drew blood lacked a certain something, all of a sudden.

 

So, when Yoshiko came back, Riko nearly jumped for joy, but she stopped when she heard Dr. Nishikino sigh affectionately next to her, flashing her a knowing smile and shaking her head. “Hm...I’ve got a trauma patient over in 104. You can take care of this,” she said, shoving Riko the file. “Looks like it’s her ankle this time.”

 

Riko took the file gingerly, giving the doctor a smile. For some reason, she felt like Dr. Nishikino was assuming things...

 

As it turned out, “her ankle” meant “she was running from a dog at a birthday party and broke her ankle”. The very thought of it made Riko nauseous. Yoshiko must have noticed, because she snickered after recounting her tale. “My, my, little demon...it seems like you’re not a dog person, if that sour look on your face is any indicator.”

 

“Understatement of the century,” Riko hissed. “My friend has this old geezer of a dog, but he’s just evil.” Riko was polite enough not to add in “I can’t wait until he croaks”, but she was rather tempted.

 

“I don’t mind them...it just seems like my bad luck _combined_ with them is an issue,” Yohane mumbled, pouting.

 

“That makes one of us.” Riko handed Yoshiko a tray that had a paper cup with water in it, along with a small, white, round pill. “Here’s a painkiller. Dr. Nishikino should be writing up your prescription soon. Oh, and...crutches for two weeks.”

 

“That’s the last time I use anything that squeaks in a magic trick...” Yohane sighed dramatically. “Oh, if _only_ _someone_ or _something_ could ease the pain of this ethereal vessel...”

 

Riko nodded towards the pill that Yoshiko was swallowing, then took the tray. “The painkiller should do the trick.”

 

“Ah-ha! You’ve got it!”

 

“What?”

 

“A trick! Let me show you a trick. That’ll make me feel better! Hand me the deck of cards in the blue box, please, along with the marker,” Yohane bellowed, bringing her hand to her face in that silly gesture that Riko hated to find so damn cute. “This fallen angel is about to rock your world, little demon; you must feel rather gratified, no matter how dire this place is.”

 

Well, she wasn’t wrong. Riko didn’t think working at a hospital would be so fun. “...I still have to go get your crutches, so make it quick,” Riko said, rifling through Yohane’s tote. She pulled out the cards and gave them to Yohane. After that, she dug some more and eventually found a red Sharpie, then handed that over as well.

 

“I require your assistance, little demon,” Yohane purred. Riko found it scary, how she almost wanted to say “I’ll do anything”. Yoshiko fanned out the cards, grinning mischievously. Almost frighteningly suave, she said, “Go on, take one and scribble your name on it.”

 

Riko furrowed her brow, but took a card, a nine of hearts, and then wrote her name on it with the marker. Yoshiko took the card, then folded it. “You’re...folding it?”

 

Yohane nodded curtly. “Next, you’re going to hold it between your teeth.”

 

“...I’m not doing that.”

 

“Come on,” Yoshiko said, near whining. “Please?”

 

Riko looked at the card skeptically, then opened her mouth. Yohane pumped her fist in the air a little, then placed the card between Riko’s lips, releasing it as she bit down. Riko had to admit that she was a little bit disappointed that Yohane’s thumb didn’t brush against her lip. She held the card there and watched as Yohane scribbled something on a king of spades, presumably her own name. However, Yoshiko was slightly turned away from Riko, so she couldn’t exactly be sure. Then, she folded that one up and put it in her mouth, with the beginnings of a smirk on her face.

 

Yohane held her hands out, palms up. Riko was nervous, and her hands were shaking (just a _little_ bit), but she took Yoshiko’s hands anyway. Riko was taller, but somehow, she felt preyed on as Yohane leaned in close, so close that Riko could smell frosting and a whiff of perfume. She still had on that little smirk, and Riko wondered if she could kiss it off, maybe...

 

Then, Yoshiko chuckled and leaned back, shaking her head and taking the card out of her mouth. “You looked like you were anticipating something...?” Before Riko could weakly stammer a response, Yoshiko unfolded the card and held it up silently.

 

And there it was.

 

The nine of hearts with Riko’s name scrawled on it.

 

Riko yelped, snatching the card from out of her own mouth. “No, no, no way-”

 

“Wait! Don’t open that. Not until you get home,” Yoshiko said.

 

“What?! Why?! I wanna see what this card is, if it’s not mine,” Riko insisted. “What did you do?!”

 

“You can open it now, but I’d prefer you didn’t, because...it’s for dramatic effect, okay? This trick is all part of a larger trick that I’ve been planning from day one.” Riko blinked hard. Yoshiko snickered, looking away sheepishly. “Fallen angels know how to think big. Just don’t open it until you get home, okay?”

 

Riko sighed, but left the card folded, shoving it into her shirt pocket. “Alright, you win. I won’t open it until I get home...”

 

* * *

 

Fallen angels really _did_ know how to think big. Riko was itching to open the card up all day, but she also didn’t want to spoil whatever trick Yohane had in store for her. Finally, after an excruciating couple of hours, Riko was able to get in her car and drive home. After a quick shower, she pulled the card out of her pocket and plopped on her bed, taking a deep breath. She opened the card, and there, scrawled in print around the edges, were 10 numbers preceded by two words that made Riko’s heart skip a beat:

 

_Call me._

 

Riko’s fingers moved at the speed of light as she dialed the number on her phone, blushing furiously. As soon as the ringing stopped, she said, “Seriously? Wasn’t that a bit excessive?”

 

“But endearing, no?”

 

Somehow, Yoshiko’s voice still sounded gorgeous even through the phone. Riko ran her thumb over the face of the card, sighing. “Alright, I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt. But what’s this ‘big trick’, anyway?”

 

“Oh, well, that’s simple,” Yohane said, chuckling. The arrogant lilt in her voice made Riko blush even harder, against her will. “The trick was...to get your number!”

**Author's Note:**

> yoshiko, every day after this: oHHHhhhh NuuUUuuRSse SAKuraUCHI everyhting HURTS pls heAl this daTenShI with many many ~~smooches~~ :3


End file.
